Posts Tagged ‘integrity’

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What is your Superpower? – part 2

October 23, 2008

Continued from “What is your Superpower – part 1

To me, The Incredibles is not about some super-humans who go about saving the world because they have extraordinary powers. They all have to overcome their perceived limitations and the limitations placed on them by a society that is only comfortable with mediocrity. Once they allow themselves to be who they really are, they start gaining self-confidence by embracing their individuality. In embracing the thing that makes them “different” they find that their unique attributes are their greatest strengths. Only upon embracing their uniqueness do they claim their true power and start to trust themselves to know what the right thing is to do in any given moment.

We all have attributes that set us apart from others. We all have unique characteristics that make us who we are. The Incredibles is not about some other-worldly super-human people, it is about embracing the self and believing in yourself to be and do what is right in every moment. It is about trusting your instincts and not stepping on your own foot. Most importantly, not giving a hoot about anyone else’s opinions about who you should be, what you should do or how you should act.

To be continued…

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What’s Your Superpower? – part 1

October 20, 2008

If you have ever watched the Disney/Pixar movie, The Incredibles you might relate to the idea that we all have our own set of superpowers.  For most of us, life parallels the movie in that we hide our true nature because we are afraid of ridicule, judgment and not fitting in.

In the movie, at one time, there were Superheroes all over the place, being true to their power and knowing exactly what to do in each situation.  They were completely true to themselves and in their willingness and courage to be true to themselves, they made the world a better place for everyone.

Then, after a series of disasters where many people would have died (and didn’t) the consciousness shifted and normal people who saw themselves as “less than” decided to file multiple lawsuits which cost the government millions in legal fees.  This caused the government to create a protection program to hide the identities of the superheroes and forced them all to go into hiding.

Through the years, the superheroes freely used their superpowers only in private settings and when in public settings, they used their powers in dysfunctional ways. They made every effort to hide their true identities out of fear of being discovered for who they really were.

Continued in part 2…

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Embracing the Inner Bitch

October 16, 2008

A huge step in my personal growth process was learning how to embrace my inner bitch. Women oftentimes go through life trying to keep our good face forward while attending to the needs of others. Sometimes we just don’t feel like being so accommodating so we hide behind a wall of niceties and platitudes while seething inside because we are afraid of our true feelings. This behavior perpetuates cycles of self-denial until we really start to become aware of our inner seething.

A few years ago, I was caught up in a complicated relationship scenario with a man in my spiritual family. Shortly after our involvement abruptly ended, the man started seeing another woman within the same spiritual circle. Although the man would not talk to me directly, and I never felt I had any closure, he was more than happy to have his new woman battle me. Day after day we battled in front of my spiritual family while they helped us get through the process. Every time I had a minor breakthrough, I expressed superficial gratitude to her for helping me see it.

One day, one of the men in our group said, “Kerri, stop! You don’t appreciate her, you don’t love her, you are not grateful for her being in your life to help you understand your process. You are very similar. You are both passionate about your spiritual growth process, you are both intelligent, you are both outspoken and you both have attracted the same type of man. Admit that you wish she never stepped foot into your life!” I didn’t want to admit that. I wanted to see the good in the situation but was unwilling to admit to myself that I was really seething.

I realized that my friend was right. Rather than telling her how much I appreciated her, I just admitted that I hated everything about her presence in my life. This is when things started getting really good.

I calmed down, and realized that what I saw in her was my exact reflection and I had been fighting myself all along. From then on, I would not meet her attack and I validated everything she said about me as truth.

Eventually, she softened and we both realized that we were almost exactly alike. I had to embrace my inner bitch and let myself voice my true feelings. Once that happened, the thought of being a bitch no longer held power over me. I could allow myself to feel when something isn’t right and express that without worrying about how people perceive me. Now, if people think I’m a bitch so be it, the thought no longer holds any power over me. I find it amusing to witness when people try to insult me and become irritated because their words can not affect my peace of mind. Knowing you can be perfectly content while someone is trying to insult you is perhaps the sweetest revenge there is.

The woman and I are now very close. In fact, she is one of the few people who I completely trust. After the fighting stopped, the guy quickly dumped her, joined a cult, got someone pregnant and married to the mother of his new baby. Now I can honestly say I do love her I would not be who I am now without our experience. Embracing my inner bitch allowed me to see that no matter what I feel, it’s all okay and I just needed to accept it because in accepting it, I accepted myself.

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